Eenie, Meenie, Miney, Moe

Aug 11, 2011
Eenie, meenie, miney, moe
Catch a tiger by the toe
If he hollars let him go
Eenie, meenie, miney, moe.
As a kid, my friends and I would often put our fists in a circle and say the little rhyme to "fairly" decide who would go first in whatever game we were playing. I say "fairly" because I'm pretty sure every kid went faster or slower in order to choose themselves. Can I get a witness? Come on you know you did this too. :)

I feel like this is what happens when making the first move in the asking out game of life. The guy makes the first move. No, no, no the girl makes the first move. It's the guy's job. Girl power baby! Eenie, meenie, miney, moe.

Story from my life: A friend and I go to a restaurant, and lucky us...a very attractive guy waits on us. Score! We're talking a beautiful smile, very attractive eyes and well groomed (a must on the list). He takes our order and walks away and instantly my friend and I begin to discuss our waiter and his level of hotness (again, you know you do this too). Each time he returns I try to strike up a conversation with him. "Try" is the key word here. Well, he has to have some faults I guess. Our meal comes to an end and so the bill comes. Now my friend suggests that I write my number on the ticket. This makes me nervous for many obvious reasons and some paranoid reasons (he could still be a creeper). But the thought I kept coming back to is he didn't really initiate a conversation, not really flirty and basically didn't make some move of his own.

So I came to this conclusion: I think it is his job, if he's interested he needs to take some initiative and put his number on the ticket or napkin or tell me when he works next. Something. Anything. He didn't. So I didn't. (I guess it is possible that he just wasn't interested, but that doesn't make much sense to me.)

Am I wrong in thinking this?

Call me a romantic, but I think: a girl flirts, a guy asks her out. End. Of. Story. Women's lib may have been beneficial in many areas, but I can't agree that this is one of them.

So who do you think needs to make the "first move"? Comment or vote on the Me, Money and Me Facebook page.


  1. Julie said...:

    I tend to agree with you, at least personally, that it's good for the guy to make the first move. But there are always exceptions to the rule. I have a friend who has said she doesn't think she'd be married right now if she hadn't made the first move. I think it can really depend on the people involved (and their personalities!).

  1. Corey York said...:

    Guys sometimes don't make the first move because they are afriad of being rejected. A woman's flirtatious actions are not always as obvious as she thinks they are. And that's probably due to exactly what you're expressing in this post: because a woman doesn't want to come off as making the first move she will be more reserved in her flirtatious actions. However, when she does this, it keeps the guy guessing. And guys dont like to guess becasue they risk being wrong. And the only thing guys hate more than guessing is being wrong.

    And thats especially true if he's been wrong before - if he's been made a fool of or been made to look ridiculous for making a move on a girl that didn't want him to make a move. If a guy's ego is easily bruised then he will not risk bruising it. You as the woman have to let him know that his ego is safe in your hands, then, if he's interested, he will make his move.

  1. Emma Waters said...:

    Ok, here it is in a nutshell: a girl wants to date a man, not a boy. What does that mean? It means she doesn't want to date a guy who's too afraid to admit whether or not he likes her. Being a boy about the situation, instead of being a man, is a sure-fire way to lose her interest and, at best, get dropped into the "friend" zone. (Oh yes, it's so much worse than it sounds.)

    Now, I'm not saying he should go into battle and ask the girl out without any strategy. There is a grace period. So the guy can feel out the situation and see how responsive she is. The girl's responsibility is to make him feel as comfortable as possible with the situation. Stroke his ego, if you will. In a couple of words: the girl must flirt. However, just like the periods in hockey, the timer does eventually wear down and he is forced to ask the question or not. A guy waits too long--the girl loses interest--and they both lose out on a potentially fulfilling relationship.

    Not to mention, sometimes when the girl is forced to make the first move, she's only emasculating him and his role in the relationship. He's just not the "man" she was hoping for, but she's willing to compromise and date him anyways. So don't complain guys, if you're suddenly not wearing the pants anymore (figuratively speaking). She just may think you're not up for the challenge.

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